Spiritual desires, that’s the way I can recall my past few years. I wasn’t happy with myself, my education, salary, introverted personality and so on. I was sure I must make a big change, become a different individual, so I worked very hard everyday and learned many new knowledges in my spare time in order to make up for my lack of ability and many hateful shortcomings. Fortunately, after four years I can earn more money, buy the car and house. Sounds nice, right? However, I was still not satisfied with myself, I didn’t know why, just felt I’m not good and my impression is bad on others. I was always quite bummed every day.
Until I’ve met a magical guy, he asked me to let go some things. I was confused that what things I need to put down, he anwsered me ‘Desires‘. Hey! What are you saying? Material desire or sexual desire? I just want me to be a better man, is that wrong? He said Spiritual Desires and asked me to thinking about three questions. Now I understand and know that put down is the road leading to the door of happiness.
Why Do You Think You Are Not Good?
Obviously, my low education make me lose many opportunities when I was looking for a job, my introverted personality make me like a square peg in a round hole and I feel I’m out of step with the society. The low salary make me a difficult life…
Why Those Things Let You Down?
Why? I hope I can live a better life and become a excellent man. I just want to be recognized, but I can’t. Is there something wrong?
Why You Can’t?
Because I’m not good.
I was stuck in an infinite loop. Why I can’t? Because I’m not good, why I think I’m not good? Because I can’t, why I can’t…
Finally, I found the exit. Yes, because of spiritual desires. It has nothing to do with the things I did, working hard or learning the knowlege. The question is the motivation, or let’s say the nature of mind. I was always a taker, asked others for something that I felt important, but maybe the other people don’t care.
I’ve realized that no matter what my education is, I’m always working hard, so they often tell me good job and you will be better and better in the future! Although I’m a little introverted, I have more times to thinking and improving myself. I’m not a rich man, but I have a lovely dog around me, a cute daughter and thoughtful wife in my life. Is there anything better than this?
Since I’ve let go the insignificant desires, I feel calmness and happy and I’ve forgiven myself.
The picture is taken by BK